Molly's Getting Married

    This weekend I will step into a role I will never play again. Ever.  Now I've been in plenty of plays and productions and my parts have been big, little and everything in between, but this role, well this one is a big one.  I will never get the chance to do this again and I am SO honored this beautiful young lady is allowing me the opportunity.....I get to be a "Godmother of the Bride".   Yep, Molly is getting married.  My only link to being the mother of a girl is being married this weekend.   And unlike the old adage that tells me, as mother of the groom.  I will need to wear beige and be quiet when Scott gets married, this role has allowed me to help with the tulle, the ribbon, glitter, spray paint, and glorious trips to Hobby Lobby!  Being invited as she chose her dress was another precious moment.....and I will forever remember that fun morning last summer.  What seemed like a long time ago last August, has quietly crept upon us and this Saturday, June 4, 2016 my amazing Goddaughter will become Mrs. Pirner.  How did this happen?  

     Molly Jo Shanks was born in Aberdeen, SD on June 27, 1989.  I remember being so excited.  There were no Snapchat stories, no texts, or Facebook posts announcing her arrival.  Brian called our stationary phone (not even a cordless one--those were for rich people, not teachers)  probably from some payphone in the lobby at St. Luke's Hospital.  No matter how we heard the news, I remember it being an amazing day.  I had to leave that morning to go pick up Mark at a basketball camp in Huron, so we didn't get to see her right away, but when we did,  it was love at first sight.  If you think she is beautiful now(she is), I can assure you she arrived looking just the same.  

    Molly is the perfect combination of her mother's wit and beauty, and father's wise ways and concern for the common good.  She is kind, committed, and loves deeply.  She believes in kids, worries about those less fortunate than her, cheers for the underdog, and loves a great pair of shoes, literature, and  bottles of wine.  Our hearts have been filled with pride as she moved on to earn her teaching degree and has spent the last three years filling minds with her love of reading and language arts.  She's been a cheer coach, play director, annual staff mentor, and more.  She spends here days with middle school kids (hence, the wine bottles) and her nights correcting essays and planning lessons.  We are so very proud to call her our Goddaughter. She and Tate shared some similarities that come with being the oldest child---some of the tweets they shared involved poking fun at their mothers and our lack of being able to be on time for family trips.  I must admit--they were right about me, and if Melissa contests this, well.....she's lying.  We have good intentions, we just run by a different clock sometimes.  

   

     On Saturday, Molly will walk down the aisle to meet her soulmate--a fine young man named Grayson.  He is a wonderful young man--quiet, kind, funny, charming, and sweet. (And a huge wrestling fan.)  We love him.  He makes her laugh, calms her down when things get rocky, and rolls easily with the tides that all relationships bring. When he proposed,  he had no idea that he would also be getting a Godmother-in-law,  so say a prayer for this dear sweet man.  No one should have two mother-in-laws.....:)   (You're stuck with me, Grayson.  Sorry) 

    When Molly graduated from high school in 2008 I babbled on in a letter.  I still have this on my computer and as I re-read it this afternoon, I found myself wanting to tell her all of these same things as she prepares to take the next step in her amazing life. Ironically in college, she found some amazing friends who just happen to be Winner girls.  (Seriously, who can go wrong with Winner girls?)   I flashed back to all the things that have changed the past eight years....there are faces we will miss Saturday.  Tate and Janet come instantly to mind.   There are places and people who have exited both Molly and Grayson's life, yet have played a huge role in the people they have become.   Life is like that---things are not forever, but the people, places, and experiences we share traveling through life make us who we are....the good, the bad, the funny, the infuriating--all of these things have brought Molly and Grayson to where they are today.   Never forget that....and never forget to take it all in, even the bad stuff.  Grab onto all of it.... for life is short. 

    I am not sure if you still have this letter dear Molly, so here it is again.  A few corrections were made. ( If you have the time to grade it, I'm guessing it's about an  88% for the mechanics, but 100% filled with love.)  I cannot wait to celebrate with you this weekend. You are loved more than you will ever know.  

Dear Molly,

            I have written and rewritten this letter a million times in my head.  Now that it is time to put it on paper, I find myself stumped.  I need to tell you something wonderful or smart or wise….I am your Godmother for goodness sake.  Isn’t that my job?  I am then reminded that you are already all of those things-- a wonderful young lady  with a strong head on her shoulders.  Much wiser than I ever was when your mom and I crossed paths twenty some years ago and this extraordinary friendship between us began.

            I would love to start from the beginning but paper and time would not allow for this to happen.  There is simply too much to say.   Your mom was one of the first new people I met when I transferred to Northern in 1983.  She was a “seasoned” NSU coed—she knew the ropes, the “hangouts” and the day to day things that made life at Northern so much fun.  We spent the first year hanging out during the week and heading out on the weekends.  Narcel was our common bond and we found out we had many similar interests, likes and dislikes and we were both traveling down the road of education, much to our fathers’ dismay.  We were sad to head out for home the summer that May of 1984, but we looked forward to the fall.

            As our years at Northern passed, your mom became one of my very good friends.  We did things that bring laughter to only our ears and memories.  We had many of those “you had to be there” moments that only college kids experience.  We did things we pray you NEVER do, and if you do end up in these moments, neither of us will want to hear about it.  Secretly though, I know we both pray you have those very same experiences and adventures with your college buddies. 

            I was there the night your parents met, shared in their wedding day and watched as they headed out “west” to make real money in Dupree.  ($15,500 a year….big time in 1987,  believe it or not.)  We enjoyed heading out to Dupree and spending the weekends in the brown house.  No matter how many of us showed up, there always seemed to be room in the “expansive” 2 bedroom rental called the Shanks’ home!

            But the most exciting time in our friendship came the summer of 1989 when your parents came to Roscoe to spend the summer with us.  Your dad was working on his administration degree and they were both awaiting your arrival.  As your dad went to class, your mom and I read magazines, laughed, watched “The Guiding Light”, took walks and ate Magic Middle cookies your dad would bring back from Kessler’s in Aberdeen. We were more about the cookies and TV than the walks, but it was probably one of the craziest, laziest Junes I have ever spent.  Your mom was experiencing something new with this motherhood gig and I watched from the sidelines, not ready to begin my journey yet.  We looked at books from the doctor and worried if your mom would make to the hospital in time.  We wondered what would happen when it was actually time for you to arrive….If your mom was scared or nervous, she never let on.  She was excited for your birth and anxious to become your mother.

            What an honor it was to be asked to be your Godparents. It was the first “grown up” thing Mark and I did as a couple.  You were a beautiful baby, Molly.  Dark hair, skin and beautiful, bright piercing eyes lit up your face.  You’re the only person on earth (besides my own boys) who would compel me to hitch a ride home to Roscoe in Donnie Farley’s semi trailer JUST so I could come to your baby shower. (Mark was coaching and couldn’t come get me…only bring me over the weekend. Donnie was my only way home!)

            We have watched as you have grown throughout the years, Molly.  Pictures, occasional visits and a “few” phone calls have kept us in touch throughout the early years.  We always wanted to see you more than time and space allowed.  As I had my own babies and started my own journey into motherhood, it was tougher to see you regularly. Luckily, your mom and I talk “every once in a while” on the phone and she would keep me posted on your happenings.

            As we have watched you grow up from afar, Molly, we have been so very proud of the wonderful young lady you have become.  We are still honored to be your Godparents and pray for your safety each night.  We know you are excited to begin this new phase of your life.  You are ready thanks to your teachers and family and your preparation for this time has been time well spent.  As you head out into the big world, we will continue to pray for your safety and we will look forward to seeing all the wonderful things you will do with your opportunities.

            As much as I want things to be perfect for you Molly, I pray even more that you find a friend like I have in your mother.  No matter how far apart we have lived, no matter what is going on in our lives, no matter our opinions on things, your mom is the person I can hardly wait to tell when things are going good or bad, crazy or sane.  She was there when my dad died, has listened and shared in the miseries of being a “coach’s wife” and understands the craziness of the world I have chosen for myself.  Your dad and Mark have had their fill of our phone bills and the money we’ve spent keeping in touch, but I will look back and know it may be some of the best money I’ve ever spent.  I want you to have that friend, Molly.  That is my prayer for you.  It may sound simple and rather vague right now, but I know you will understand this as you continue to make your way in this crazy world…..

            God Bless You as you graduate today.  We hope you are surrounded always by kind people, a loving family and good health.  Take care and know we are always here for you no matter what you need….We love you, Molly.      

Love, Your Godmother